Hello and welcome to Not a Vegetarian. I’m Jack Faulkner, and every week I share a different story and recipe from my week as I muddle my way through the world of food.
This week, I’m taking a break from the current series to tell you about my recent holiday to Amsterdam, and in a bid to prove that the city is a lot more than just cannabis, prostitutes and stroopwafels, I’m going to be sharing what I ate during my four-day stay.
Some of it was great, some of it was not, and most cost a few more euros than necessary, but I really enjoyed my time in the Dutch capital.
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Monday
After a pretty stress-free flight from the UK, I eagerly arrived at Schiphol, mainly looking forward to my upcoming adventures and wondering how it can take 20 minutes to walk from my plane to the exit. The initial taxi ride was quite overwhelming with the poor driver having to traverse through complete gridlock on the roads, squads of whistling road workers on every corner and crowds of cycling parents outside every single school in the area. But, despite him nearly crashing into a tram and demanding that I stay with him after we arrived so that he could explain the full details of his recent triple heart bypass, I arrived safely. It even turns out that his explanation of his heart surgery came in handy after I nearly collapsed clutching my left arm when the fee turned out to be €61,50 for travelling 4km.
Pizza!
Although Amsterdam isn’t exactly known for its pizza or vibrant Italian community, I was in the mood for pizza so I hopped on the tram to what I had been told was the most authentic pizzeria in Amsterdam, L’Antica Pizzeria da Michele in De Pijp. I wanted to stick with the essentials, so I ordered a margherita.
At first, I thought my pizza was to feed a family of 10, but it actually turned out to be mine. It was absolutely delicious and most of the dough’s thickness must have been lost to the sheer size of the bloody thing, so it was actually very easy to eat and, like the pig I am, I ate the entire thing.
Unfortunately, I forgot to take any pictures, but for a mental image, imagine a normal pizza and then double the size a couple of times.
So, with my belly full of pizza, I went to bed happy and looking forward to what culinary offerings the next day would bring.
Tuesday
On Tuesday I decided to venture out into the big wide world and have a wander around some neighbourhoods close to where I was, like the Negen Straatjes and de Spui. You’re probably shouting at your screen asking “why didn’t you rent a bike?” at this point, but the truth is that after a cyclist who was breastfeeding her child, shaking a smoothie and looking at her phone crashed into me, I was slightly put off by the thought of rush hour on the cycle lanes and decided to only use my two feet for the day. Being able to explore was very nice, but I soon got a bit overwhelmed and hungry, so I decided to head straight to my next foodie spot - Vleminckx Friteshuis in de Spui.
Just salt?
After hearing a lot of hype about this tiny chip shop just off the square in de Spui, I decided to test it out for myself. Immediately, there was a long queue - but that gave me plenty of time to look at the extensive sauce menu. Ketchup? Belgian ketchup? Curry ketchup? Samurai sauce? Mayo? (Actually, maybe not that one - mayo is vile) I couldn’t make up my mind, so I decided to just go with the only salt. The woman serving me gave me a look as though I’d just asked her to sell her child into slavery, but I got away with my preposterous order, and when it was very quickly made, I hurried off before more locals started judging me. I’ll start by saying it was definitely worth the visit - the chips were light and fluffy on the inside and crispy on the outside - but I should have been a bit more adventurous and tried a sauce.
The countryside + ice cream = Great afternoon
I didn’t want to spend all my time in the city so I decided to venture out into North Holland to explore some of the famous Dutch countryside. I’d heard that there’s a beautiful nature park known as Twiske just north of Amsterdam, outside the towns of Oostzaan and Landsmeer, so I decided to go there for a walk. After being healthy for a bit, I treated myself to an ice cream in Landsmeer. They had more flavours of ice cream and sorbet than I thought were possible, so after being a bit bland at Vleminckx I decided to be adventurous and ordered a dragonfruit sorbet.
It’s probably not worth driving all the way up here from Amsterdam, but if you happen to be around Landsmeer, I definitely recommend stopping at Multi-IJs.
Wednesday
Today was going to be the big day of the holiday, and I planned to go to both the Rijksmuseum and Van Gogh Museum, which seems a bit ridiculous now I think about it. Nonetheless, I woke up bright and early and headed straight off to the Rijksmuseum. After a couple of hours of seeing art and filling my phone up with pictures of paintings, I got a bit hungry, so I stopped at the pretentious café and ordered a pretentious tomato sandwich. The tomato was beautiful, the cheese was alright, but there was enough mayo to choke a horse.
I hoped the food at the Van Gogh café would be better, so I went straight there and ordered some chips. They were nice, but nothing to write home about. I suppose that didn’t really matter anyway as I was here for art, not chips.
Asian sarnie
Don’t worry, I haven’t just committed a hate crime. I’m actually describing the meal I had later that evening, which was an Asian sarnie. (To the uninitiated out there, sarnie is short for sandwich.) Despite what I thought that day, I did still have to eat after looking around galleries, so I decided to tick something off the list and go to CHUN, evidently Amsterdam’s best sandwich shop. Romantically situated between a seedy coffeeshop and a shitty nail bar, it was quite unassuming from the outside, but I wasn’t immediately scared off by the drug addict shouting at me as I walked down the road, or the massive queue forming outside the door. I’m glad I wasn’t - the sandwiches were unbelievable. A thick slice of toasted Korean milk bread, slit down the middle to make a pocket and filled with crunchy slaw, puffy tofu and a delicious spicy-sweet sauce. I probably ate mine in under a minute, which was worth it despite the health implications. Definitely something you must try.
Harry Estorph? Larry Egbert? Hans Eldon?
Alright, alright, alright, I know I said at the start that I wanted to prove that Amsterdam was more than cannabis, prosititutes and stroopwafels, but I couldn’t come to the Dutch capital and not go to a traditional bakery. I went to one of the most famous ones in town the name of which escapes me but was something along the lines of Hank Egmann. After seeing the stroopwafels being created, pressed and filled with caramel, I was looking forward to my sweet treat, but unfortunately, it wasn’t the best. Definitely go to a stroopwafel place when in Amsterdam, but maybe not Barry Leghorn.*
Thursday
Koekjes
On the last day of my trip to Amstedam, there was just one more thing I wanted to cross off. Luckily for me but perhaps not for my blood sugar levels, this happened to be Amsterdam’s most famous cookie shop, known as Van Stapele Koekmakerij. Even with a queue lining the whole street, service was very quick, and I soon received my special cookie - the only type they make - before I started drooling too much at the thought. Let me just say that if you’re in Amsterdam, you have to come here. The cookie was heavenly - a dark chocolate dough filled with gooey white chocolate - and was gone within a few seconds. Out of all the places I’ve been to, this was probably the most worth visiting.
And with that, I bade farewell to Amsterdam with my stomach satisfied and my phone already filled with things to eat on my next trip.
If you’ve ever been to Amsterdam or if you live there yourself, I’d love to hear your thoughts - so please leave a comment below.
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Thanks a lot for reading Not a Vegetarian. See you next week!
You've reminded me I want to try Gilgeori toast as soon as possible! I love eating Indonesian when in Amsterdam. When I first came to Europe moons ago it was the closest thing to authentic Malaysian food I could find!
Gorgeous piece! There was a Christmas market in Amsterdam selling the best fried fish I have ever tasted in my life, and I wish to this day I'd taken note of the name of the producer. Such an underrated city for food outside of the stroopwaffel-bitterballen-pancake triangle (although I am also partial to all of those things).